Gone fishin'

Yesterday, I placed a call to my friendly neighborhood unemployment office to change from having federal taxes withheld from my payments, to not having them withheld, since it turns out that part of the "stimulus package" is to allow $2400 as untaxed income. I was on hold for 20 minutes, which is really not that bad, if you ask me. In the state with the highest unemployment rate in the country, I wouldn't have been surprised if the wait had been twice that long.

What did surprise me was some of the monotonous, taped drivel someone on hold has to listen to for all that time. By all means, encourage people to hang up and go online instead; remind people that after filing, it may take 6 weeks to get a response; encourage people to call some other number for such-and-such. But suggest that people "go fishin'"? Really?

Yes, one of the taped messages is provided by the state's organization for leisure activities, and that's fine. But the voice is "old-timey," like the voice used for Country Time Lemonade (which is basically poison, by the way--but perhaps I'll save that for another posting), recalling a past in which local merchants would put a sign on the door on perfect summer afternoons that said "Gone Fishin'." Uh huh.

Those of us on hold for 20 minutes, waiting to speak to someone about unemployment benefits, don't really need to hear about vacation opportunities in the area. I'm not saying we should all be working day and night to find a new job, exhausting ourselves and wallowing in despair (though I'm sure there are plenty doing that, too). I'm just wondering who the makers of the message think their audience is at that point.

I'm not even pretending to be one of the worst-off, because I absolutely am not. In fact, I'm flat-out amazed at how much money I'm going to end up getting, but I am not a single parent, nor am I the only wage-earner for my family. For me, it doesn't mean selling my house or giving my pets back to an animal shelter, or trying to find a buyer for my car. It doesn't mean living on tuna fish and macaroni and cheese. It doesnt even mean I have to sell my engagement ring or take my kids out of private school, which is the only school they've ever known.

But I'm not exactly planning vacations, either. I'm trying to work out a balance of applying for new work, spending time with my family, taking care of household chores, and figuring out exactly what I want to do with my life so maybe my next job will be longer-lasting and even more fulfilling.

Besides, I am morally opposed to fishing. Even if you throw the fish back in, it's terrifying and painful for the poor thing. So, when we are more solidly back on our feet and planning our next in-state vacation, the sign on our door will read "Gone...somewhere."